Sick and emotional

When I get sick, and I mean the kind of sick where you're in bed with a fever and not enough energy to do more than sleep, I get emotional.
I'm not sure why. I start to feel vulnerable and want to curl up and be cuddled.
Warning: This post is going to be all about how great it is to have someone who loves you.

I'm still sick. This bug is strong and has had me down more days than I've been up. It's strange. It hits hard one day, the next day I start to feel a little better and so I venture out and do a few errands, etc. and the next day I'm flat on my back. Well, not flat, because I can't breathe. So I prop myself up on pillows and sleep all day.

I got up late yesterday, and got in the shower thinking I'd just go at my own pace and get ready to take Sean to school. We'd be late, but they'd understand when they saw me walk into the office with him to get his late slip. I looked like crap.
I didn't expect to see Chuck, because he was on shift, and right after he got off yesterday morning there was a union meeting, and then he had a meeting with some community people about disaster prep stuff, and then he'd be home.
But to my surprise he came in the door as I was getting out of the shower. He woke Sean up for school, and then he got busy in the kitchen and made us breakfast.
I was planning to just hit a drive through on the way, but he said he'd have it ready by the time Sean was dressed. He had just enough time to cook for us and then go back out the door for his union meeting.
We all left about the same time, and I came back and went to bed.
Chuck came home and made me chicken noodle soup for lunch with ingredients from the pantry because we didn't have any cans of it in the cupboard. And I slept some more.
He picked Sean up from school for me, came home and made dinner, then delivered pages to my layout guy who puts together the newspaper.
When he got back we ate dinner and Chuck helped tuck Sean into bed and read to him for a long time.
Then he came to bed and cuddled me until I fell asleep again.

I guess there are women who would think nothing of this. It's what they know as normal. For me, I was alone for a long time. When I was sick, I just had to make do. If I was too sick to take Sean to school, he didn't go. If I was too sick to cook, we ate sandwiches, or cereal or whatever was easiest.

Loving someone feels so good, and to have them love you back is one of the best feelings in the world.

It Got Me

I spent last week drinking cup after cup of Airborne in an attempt to stave off this illness that had two of my favorite guys in bed. Sean got it first, and when Chuck came home from fighting a wildfire for five days, he had it by the next morning.

Well, I gave it all I had with that Airborne and extra Vitamin C. I started to feel it Saturday night and by Sunday morning it had hold of me.

I'm writing this in bed on a laptop.

It was a very busy week. I held the staff retreat on Saturday. I spent about a month and a half planning, scheduling speakers, and arranging for sponsors. As it got closer I started putting together the bios of the speakers so I could introduce them correctly, getting rsvps for attendance so we could order enough lunches, etc. and figuring out where the breakfast items would come from. That was all done last week. My assistant helped with getting the lunches and some of the supplies for our breakout sessions. She is so great at helping me form the agenda. It's a lot of work, and every year I've done it I've wished I could do it during a week that isn't so busy for me, but I enjoy putting it all together.

This year our focus was on advertising sales. I invited two guests to speak to us about sales, and specifically about print media.
They were awesome.

And though I was trying to pace myself, I think it all just created a breeding ground for this sickness.

Saturday was also the day for the Honoring First Responders event at our church. It's not a church event, but our church hosts it. Chuck took the kids there for the day while I was at the retreat. Immediately after that we were scheduled to attend an outdoor party. I met him at the event, he changed from his firefighter uniform shirt to a dress shirt and jacket, and we hit the road.

The party was lovely. Susan and her husband were hosting it with their next door neighbors. I know Susan from Golden Beads, a non-profit that supports public Montessori education. I've just gotten to know her a little bit, and she's so great, and now she's cycling off the board. I hope to stay in touch with her anyway.

Only in this area of the country would you find a bunch of people, probably about 50 of them and their kids, enjoying an outdoor barbeque in the rain. There were a couple of lawn tents, and we were able to stay relatively dry, but the kids were just romping around in the soggy grass, swinging on the swing set, and running around.  Most events, from corporate to neighborhood, are "rain or shine" because if we only did things in the shine, we wouldn't be doin' much.

The party began a few years back when they celebrated the gate/fence that connects their back yards. I heard a few people talking about the zucchini race they had last year at this annual event.
We met some really nice people, and the food was so good. There were many types of sausages, some chili and plenty of beverages and snacks.

Sunday was kick-off for Sunday school. Unfortunately I was sick and couldn't be there. I know the people who took care of it did a stellar job, but I felt awful that I was not there. I'm the leader for Children's Ministry this year. We are using Godly Play for the young ones, ages 3-6, and for our older children we go more in-depth with the stories and we call that class Godly Explorers. You can read more about it here.

I love the curriculum and enjoy so much watching such young children form a relationship with their faith. It is a beautiful thing. I get to see them grow in their understanding and truly make it their own versus repeating something they've been told just because it was told to them by an adult. I love the foundation's explanation of what Godly Play is.

Today Chuck and I nailed down a date for a neighborhood Halloween party. I'm excited to get started on it, but the only thing I feel like doing right now is searching on the Internet for ideas to implement in our decorations.

I've been inspired by a few things I've found here.
Chuck is so handy that he can help me make a lot of stuff.
I'm envisioning a kids area, and an adult area. I'm not much on the horror stuff, but tasteful spooky is good.

Hero

I remember it well.  Those of us who were old enough will never forget Sept. 11, 2001, and we share a common bond that way. It's kind of like when I was a kid, and the adults in my life would sometimes talk about where they were when they heard the news that President Kennedy had been shot.
Some of the places they were seemed so insignificant, like standing in front of the kitchen sink washing dishes, or some such mundane thing like that. As a child I didn't get it. Now I do. I have my own kitchen sink story. Just as mundane, I was in the shower getting ready for work when I heard that a plane had crashed into the World Trade Center. Just as I got downstairs we saw that another had hit the second tower.

It has been 10 years since that day. Emotions were so heightened for everyone across the world, and so mixed. We were feeling anger, intense sadness, disbelief, confusion, helplessness, fear, and an overwhelming sense of unity for a while.
That day brought firefighters and what they do to into a spotlight. As we watched them on TV, saw images in newspapers and magazines of those firefighters trying to find and save people, my understanding of them deepened.
These are people who are willing to risk their own lives to help others daily. They go to work each day prepared to do that. They love doing it.
Suddenly, fire trucks and engines brought up emotions for me. As I waited at traffic lights and watched them pass, displaying their United States flags, tears of pride would flow.

Firefighters have always been special,  but after 9-11 they were lifted higher. The images of firefighters covered in soot and ashes at Ground Zero, the pictures of fire engines destroyed in the collapse of the towers, those pictures tell the story. These guys went in, and they went in intending to save people.
They really are heroes.

My hero with a group of heroes from our local fire district.

Another shot of him, in dress uniform during a Veteran's Day ceremony.

Today, at the end of our worship service at church, we honored the memory of that day. Our music director wrote a song and performed it as scene after scene from the Sept. 11, 2001 tragedies was displayed on the two screens that hang above the communion table. I had not forgotten it, but the images brought up the emotions again. I was intensely sad. For so many reasons. Tears flowed, and I even heard some behind me sobbing.
It's a cliche, I know, but the world changed that day. The whole world. The WHOLE world. Some of it changed for the better. Some of it, I believe, changed for the worse.

One of the things I saw that day, and in the days that followed, was how a nation could come together and truly be united. It was fleeting; it only lasted for a short time. Eventually politics took over, but for a little while we really were united. People who had never met before were crying together and holding hands as patriotic music played. All over the country, there were people who volunteered to go to New York to help with search and rescue efforts. Some of them from 3,000 miles away. Everyone wanted to go. We all wanted to do something. Little kids collected pennies, old women made patriotic hats and gave the proceeds to the rescue efforts. So many, and I mean many, stood in line for hours to donate blood, we reached deep in our pockets to donate to the Red Cross, and we prayed.

It was beyond words.

Now, 10 years later, my prayer is still the same. I pray that our young children won't have a kitchen sink story to tell. I pray that human beings will realize that love is waiting for them. That love is an answer to hatred and violence. I pray that every child in every country will know that God is in their heart, and that love is waiting there to blossom and heal everything.

A Kinder Way Wednesday: Non-punishing discipline

I grew up being punished for what my parents and teachers said were wrong behaviors. While this worked pretty well, I don't really think it is the best way to teach a child how to behave.
I admit it is my first reaction. Someone does something wrong, my first thought is punish them for doing it. It's how I grew up. But my logical side realizes this method really only teaches fear.

For most of us this fear works really well to deter us from behaving badly. Whether it is physical punishment, extra chores, or taking privileges, punishment is supposed to stop bad behavior.

Punishment is not always followed by rational conversation to explain why we should or shouldn't do certain things. We eventually mature and figure out why, but there are some who don't. Punishment is quick and usually easy. (I won't veer off in the prison as punishment topic right now, which is not always quick or easy.)

Instead I like to have high expectations for appropriate behavior, and constantly talk about why we should behave in certain ways. This takes intention and time. I admit sometimes I slip and revert to a threat of punishment, but I try hard not to. I've watched kids who constantly get grounded or punished continue doing same behaviors. It's almost as if it becomes a way to get desired attention, or a way to fulfill some role they've become accustomed to over the years. (I'm the kid. I'm expected to do things wrong, and then dad or mom punishes me. I get to whine about being grounded, and feel like a victim, which initiates at least some conversation and attention.)

It makes me wonder why the parents continue to dole out the punishment when it really does nothing to get the desired end result. I'm not perfect, and I've made a lot of mistakes as a parent, but I think the answer to bad behavior is more time with parents. When they are really young, redirection is very effective. As they grow older, evening walks, family game nights, special one-on-one time doing something the child really enjoys, and quiet time devoted to strengthening relationships can go a long way in getting the results we want.

What are your thoughts on punishment?

Sharing some beauty

The dahlias are in bloom. I like to share. Here are a few photos.

Burst of beauty.

Pinterest

I try my best to keep up with the latest on everything, but it is quite a job. I'm a little behind on this Pinterest thing. I learned about it through another blog, then started thinking how cool it would be to have such a thing.

You pin things on the board that you come across that flip your switch. I like it. Sometimes I don't have a lot to say about something, but still want to share it. It's kind of like having a cork board, but it's on the Internet. It's somehow hooked into Facebook.

So I guess you can "follow" people on Pinterest. I just signed up and I'm already "following" some people and I only know one of them. It automatically set me up with some people based on my interests.

I pinned some images today on my boards. The boards are in categories like Photography, Neighborhood Finds, My Style, etc. I might change those a bit. I made my own that's called, Just Because.

As I go I'll edit through and refine it. In case you're curious, here's where you can see my boards and click to follow me.
http://pinterest.com/marshahart/pins/

Dessert and Treasured Cups

I wish I had written down more of what my mom told me. There are so many things she said that were funny, or wise, or just interesting. Some of those things I do remember, others are gone like the wind.
She used to tell me about some of the family items and say, "That was your great grandfather's trunk," or "That was your great grandma's chair," but I can never remember which side of the family. These were people I either never met, or don't remember very well.

There is a point to this, and it does involve dessert.

Last week the blackberries began to ripen, and Chuck picked a bowl full. I added some sugar and put them in the frig while I made a quick Bisquick shortcake. I baked those while we ate dinner.

Fresh-from-the-oven shortcake and some blackberries with whipped cream sounded like a great dessert.

Then I remembered we had just unpacked these beautiful little cups. They were my great grandmother's. Not sure which one. I remember them from when I was a little girl, but I think we only used them once. I vaguely remember it. I mostly remember them being in the cupboard, high up where we couldn't reach them.

I love these little crystal cups. They're so dainty, and have so much detail.

These cups somehow traveled to Tennessee, and I'm not sure when. I don't know if they were given to my mom before she and my dad moved to Tenn., way back before I was born, or if they were sent to her, or if she picked them up on one of our trips out here when I was small.
The cups were then moved back to Washington when she moved back here, and got moved several times once they were here. They just got moved again a couple of weeks ago. I decided these pretty little things needed to see the light of day and that we should enjoy them.
I would hate for any of them to get broken, but I've decided life is short, and we need to stop saving things and use what we have and enjoy the beauty of our treasures.