Stress comes in different ways and has different meanings for me.
It is most common for me to feel stressed when I have a lot of things to do in a short amount of time. And that is pretty much every day.
I know that I do it to myself. Take yesterday, for example. I needed to go shopping at a particular store that has the items that were on my list. I knew that to drive there would take a while, and once I got there the shopping could take a while. And I needed to be home with dinner by about 5:30 p.m. because Chuck had to be somewhere by 6:30. I used up some time trying to find something they didn't have at the store, and when I looked at my clock it was 4 p.m. Good grief. I needed to get everything on my list in the shopping cart within 30 minutes, and be on my way to the car. It's a huge store. I had to pray the lines were moving fast, too.
Stress also comes when there are things happening in my life that I have no control over. Sickness, car trouble, an unexpected bill that depletes my bank account. I also feel a little bit of stress when people around me are stressed or unhappy.
Over the years I have dealt with the stress in different ways.
Sometimes I like it, because I get this adrenaline rush going and I become really focused and good at what I'm doing. But that's when it's the kind of stress that I do have some control over. This is usually a work-related stress, and as long as I'm allowed to work and not be interrupted during that rush to get something accomplished, I do it well.
Other times I don't do so well. I hate to say no and I love being busy, but there is a limit to what one human being can accomplish in a day. I put a lot of pressure on myself to get things accomplished. I used to really beat myself up when things went wrong, or I messed something up.
That phrase, "beating myself up," or the way people will say, "don't beat yourself up about it," is really eye opening. If you think about what is happening inside of you it is really a beating. I don't think that is a very good way to treat ourselves.
And what I've come to understand in the past few years is that nothing changes. If I get so bent out of shape about something the only thing that happens is that I get bent out of shape. The thing that went wrong is still wrong, but the world didn't end. My house is still standing. In fact, nothing at all changed except I probably gave myself a shorter life span with the extra strain I put on my soul and my heart, mind, and other organs that haven't been studied yet that show a deterioration due to stress.
So I'm kinder to myself now. I let things go a lot easier than I used to. Even with my job, which is super demanding, I know that if I get irritated and angry it isn't going to change anything. The results are the same, so why not just be calm and happy.
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